Fans my ass

I've been fucking irritated by one cb reader recently, and I don't know much about her, but I do know she's a loser.

I mean, while she was a "fan" she was nice to me, so of course you don't tell people in their face that they should get less obsessed about a stranger's blog and start living their own meaningful lives, but since she is no longer feeling positive about my blog, I might as well say this.

STOP IT ALREADY.

I know you are like 15, but that is no excuse for being practically a stalker.

Let's call her Knob Mushroom. (I'm recently very obsessed with Kingdom Of Loathing!! It's really fun, go try playing it. Woot!)

Now Knob "discovered" my blog around 3 months ago or so, and there she is, singing praises about it and how clever, insightful and pretty I am. She claimed to be my biggest fan, would leave an average of like 3 freaking comments per post, yakking meaningless rubbish about how cool and perfect Xiaxue is.

I'm like... is this person a siao ding dong or what? *frowny expression*

Then came one fine day, where my "biggest fan" read the archives, and read something she didn't like.

*cue civil war music*

It was this post, and she particularly did not like the little snippet of me saying I saw a Mosque worker who apparently knew nothing about his own religion. ("Is there free will?" "What is that?" *explains free will* "Oh, there is no free will.")

She wrote me a long email, claiming to be now my "ex-fan".


When I say long, I mean long.

The gist of her mail consisted of her telling me about how she really believes in her religion and that her God is all sacred - which I'm sure is very interesting and all, but I AM NOT INTERESTED.

Who gives a flying fuck about your life story? NOT ME.

The final little conclusion of her mail? Teaching me how to blog:

If you want to become a successful blogger for many years to come, here's a S U G G E S T I O N: learn to give some space in respecting others religious values.

I love how she wrote like she is the grand master of blogging and is bestowing some fruits of wisdom to me.

No really, fuck off.

I replied her:

If you read carefully enough, I am simply saying that the man I talked to was bullshitting about Islam and what he said was not true.

What the hell are you so angry about?!

Look what she replied:

Knob Mushroom Jan 6
well... I apologize for my part. I guess I misunderstood and mis-interpreted... Well, can u blame me? u shud've stated things more clearly.. aiizz... well it's ok. it's ur blog, im the one reading. i just felt upset ok. im quite religious, i don't like people making insensitive comments regarding Islam ok. its nothing to do with my sense of pride, i just don't like it when people write as if they are turning God's word around.. well, if what you say is true, i apologize for my outburst. maybe that was rude of me too. i was very disappointed though when i got angry. because i really liked reading your blog entries... well....

One word:

SIAO

What the fuck does she mean by "if what you say is true"? Can't she fucking open her fucking eyes and read the fucking blog entry herself?

For goodness sake if you are incapable of understanding simple English, don't act like you can, and attempt to correct others.

Man I hate these fucking religious bigots - as long as you are not in their religion and you mention their God, they get all jumpy and think you are trying to insult their faith.

Fuck off from my face, seriously. Not everything is about you, and nobody was trying to say any fucking thing about your religion, unless, of course, you, like the idiot I spoke to, agree that there is no free will in Islamism?

Well anyway I couldn't be bothered about her, and there we go again - she started being the biggest fan once more.

Suddenly, she is back being the biggest EX fan again, after yesterday's entry.

*roll eyes and snorts*

Stop it - do I give a shit whether you like me or not? YES - because you are quite significant due to my grand total of 5 readers which I cannot afford to lose.

All those muthafucking comments on the last entry saying you are disappointed in me - what is it that you are so fucking disappointed about, may I ask?

Do you know me very well? Am I your son whom you have recently found out has gonorrhea?

Disappointed, disappointed. Disappointed you fucking ass la, why don't you go eat shit instead?

(I wanted to insert a picture of someone eating shit here, but the pictures I found in google are seriously disturbing.)

You don't know me, so there is nothing to be disappointed about - and even if you are, don't tell me to me like it would matter, coz it doesn't.

I mean, it does matter in the sense it pisses me off, but not in the sense it hurts me.

Because you fucking self-proclaimed biggest "fans" are all idiots anyway.

Please tell me how I am supposed to continue blogging, when everything I say someone will be unhappy about it?

Today it's about my lack of compassion and Knob mushroom gets all mad, tomorrow it would be about Kingdom of Loathing and some Neopet fan will be all like,

"Wow Xiaxue, I am so disappointed in you. I thought you would know better than to like KoL over Neopets. That game is violent. I was once an avid reader, and now, I won't read your blog any more."

Yeah yeah fuck off and don't come back.

Or or like, "Xiaxue, I find you increasingly sensationalised. I think this angry post, which you cannot possibly be sincere about, is trying to create controversy once again. I am so disappointed in you, I thought you better."

Or, "Xiaxue, you are so predictable. After a controversial post, you will post a follow-up dissing people who comment meanly, and that is a sure way to get new readers."

To this I say, WHATEVER.

You think advertisers really care if I get 10,000 or 20,000 readers? Let me tell you this: They don't. Because xiaxue.blogspot.com has already established its brand name, and I don't need to create controversy for the sake of increasing my readership.

If I were interested in doing that, I would have blogged about Tammy, or Dawn's surgery, or now, Colin and Kero.

But I am not interested their businesses unless it affects me.

I only want to air out my thoughts.

And newbies here who find this post remarkably gutsy and want to claim you are my biggest fan now, why not you go play with your labia instead (that's for you boys too)?

Don't be a fucking turncoat and act like you know me so well and like me loads, then proclaim how appalled you are 3 months later, like I did something totally out of line.

What's there to be so disappointed about that I am not as compassionate as the average human? It's none of your business unlike I delibrately hurt people - which I don't.

And also, stop saying I contradict myself. I already said I have mixed feelings about my thoughts on natural selection.

Fucking fans. Go idolise someone else.

And Knob Mushroom?

FUCK YOU, STUPID BITCH.

Stop acting like you are so sad that I am now a flawed person and I can no longer be your "blog idol". It's damn disgusting can?

p/s: To the superficial people who only wanna see photos, I am editing now. However, Knob Mushroom's face keeps popping up (looks like a mushroom, of course), and I am feeling angsty so I am drawing black lines all over my friends' faces. They look like they are cursed by The Ring.

p/p/s: One more thing: I never thought the previous post was controversial. I thought most people would think that way. Guess I'm wrong, you hypocritical kind people, who did not donate your life savings to African orphans. Nor your kidneys. I wish you did. Both of them. Muahaha